First New Year Dream.

 In my first sleep of the new year I had quite a dream.  I'm sure Freud laughs and Jung is left scratching his head.  I hadn't slept for two days and then I slept 12 hours.  I'm sure there is significance in this, and perhaps one day it will come to me.  In the mean time, feel free to give me your interpretations. 

My daughter and I were on a horse in a hotel, riding down the hall, when I realized we probably shouldn't ride through the lobby because we could get in trouble, although the horse came to us, so it really wasn't our fault.  We rode outside.  Then it was just me riding and I was sometimes on a train.  I was heading to a hometown friend's birthday party.  She lived way outside of town in a rambling, big house.  Many of my girl Shubert cousins were there.  Another friend from childhood had arranged the party, which had a spy movie theme, a la the old 007 movies.  There was a big monitor with movies going all the time and at one point the birthday girl sang on the piano while my other friend played.  

On the way to the party, I saw strange animals, usually two at a time.  I'd say "There's a deer and a rhinosorus," or "Look, there's a kangaroo and a bear."  but by the time others looked, of course the train had passed.  So I said, "Just keep looking, I think it must be a Nature park or something."  The others saw and we all stopped to feed the animals.  

I had a lot of dried fruit and I fed various animals.  Then a giraffe, or some tall animal said, "Why don't we all go feed the humans?"   I thought that was only fair.  So this giraffe brought me a piece of dried plantain.  It was very good.  

Then we were back on the way to the party.  We arrived and I realized I wasn't wearing a shirt, but it didn't bother me too much, just a little.  I sat on a balcony sort of thing between the first two friends I even had, Julie and Kathy.  Besides my cousins, they were the only people there I knew.  At one point the birthday girl looked out the window and saw someone coming and said "Uh oh,"  and a guy with a Brit accent came in, rushed through the crowd, saying, "Noah, my favorite Noah," to a little boy who ran to him.  Then a snitty argument ensued between the man who was with the boy (he also had a British accent) and the man who came to pick him up.  It was obviously a divorce, custody thing.   Everyone sort of tried to ignore it.  

I was looking at the ceiling and I noticed how intricate the trim was on your walls.  My friend, the owner of the house, had  painted incredibly detailed things along all the trim.  Sometimes sayings, sometimes pictures. Just beautiful.  I thought about how very talented she was.  

Then someone said something about her, like a toast, and said something about living forever.  I knew that wasn't true and I said, "Why do you say that?  You know she won't live forever and why should she want to, blah, blah, blah"  And then I went into my song and dance about since my BBD (Big, bad diagnoses) I've been living like I'm dying and that the birthday girl is doing the same thing, which is the way EVERYONE should live.  And she agreed with me, but I noticed she was crying.  

So I realized I should really shut my fat mouth, especially in light of the fact that I was topless. Then someone came in and gave my cousin, Jill a necklace and said John, the brother of the birthday girl, said to give it to her.  That's she'd left it at his house when they were teenagers.  I butted in and said,  "Well  it's probably for her sister, Trisha, then because Trisha is closer to John's age.  Then it hit me and I said.  "Oh, I'll bet it's for Renee! (who dated John) and she isn't here.  

Then Kathy asked me, "So are you coming to the wedding?"  I asked when it was and she said, "Tomorrow in the morning," which I knew meant they didn't know the date yet.  Then I noticed her boyfriend sitting next to her.  She told me they were registered at some place in Keokuk.  I told her I didn't realize people still did stuff like that - registering for china etc.  Her boyfriend said, "Well, we're going to get it while we can."  Everyone laughed.  

Then my cousins and I got into a big discussion about one of our boy cousin's wives whom we didn't like.  In my dream she was a psych nurse and I made some comment about her knowing better who was crazy and who was not, since I'd been out of the field for so long.  I played a sort of volleyball with a balloon with cousins who sat across the room.  

One cousin, Sara, asked me if I believed in Jesus.   I said, "What does that mean - believe in Jesus?"  Do you mean do I believe he's the son of God or that he's my personal savior or what?"  Then I said, "I'm not of Christian, if that's what you mean, though I hope I am Christ-like."  It made sense at the time and it meant that I didn't go to church.   

Then it was time to leave and I walked out on to the deck with Julie, who said, "Oh, I just love the night air.  I finally feel so free!"  And someone said they were forming a car pool and so I started to go to a car.  

Then Margaret my dog started kissing me on the face and I woke up.

I'm not sure what any of this means, if it means anything other than one really should try to regulate ones sleep.  Of course, the train and the horse and the rambling house could all keep some of my psychologist friends wondering.. 

What I got from this is that even in my sleep, I'm aware of the BBD and the life changes it has brought about, that I love animals and see them as at least my equals, and that my cousins, and a couple of childhood friends are really cool people whom I love.  Overall, it was a happy dream and one that for some reason seamed significant.  Usually, once I write a dream, I get some message from it, but not so big a message this time.  

So put on your Dr. Freud secret decoder rings and have at it.  I'll await your interpretations and be grateful for them.

Amy, thanks for inviting me to your party.